Being the one for the one

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A whole lot of people are concerned about meeting the one, having that beautiful relationship, fairy-tale wedding, lots of children and the Cinderella type of ‘happily ever after.’
However, there is one cogent thing you have to realise today; to meet “The One” you have to “Be the One.” Being the one means to be WHOLE, ROUNDED and BALANCED. We would be visiting this subject in four areas.


Before any other thing, your relationship with God is the number one priority/ primary vision of your life. As a lady, you are his helpmeet and an incubator! You are to help him birth, nurture and grow his vision. If your relationship with God (the foundation) is not built on the rock to last, it is as the foolish woman who builds her home on sand and the flood comes to sweep it away. Therefore, to ‘be the one,’ God seeks your meek and gentle spirit, total submission to Him (Christ) as the Chief-Head of your being and your husband as the head of your home!

A lot of things can be termed impossible in that relationship/marriage but the word of God clearly states that the SPIRIT helps us in our weaknesses. Personally, I have very few role models who I can boldly say they are ‘superhuman’ and have everything working out for them because they have allowed for the in-dwelling of the Holy Spirit to teach them, mould them and guide them. You should do the same. Understand when the Holy Spirit is communicating with you. Be quick to listen and obey that still voice (You need to be spiritually ready for this mission).


A lot of people are roaming the street all dressed in fancy clothes, but wounded. You need to realise one thing: wounds from the past can disrupt your growth pattern and hurt your relationships with other people. To ‘be the one,’ you are to make sure that you are fully healed before embarking on a relationship. How do you do that? You need to fully surrender to JESUS; because TIME doesn’t heal wounds. “JESUS DOES” therefore, your heart is to be made right with God for you to have a whole heart.

If you are an emotionally wounded person and you conceal it so perfectly in the relationship, be assured that it is going to be amplified when you are married and I am sure you know what that means. Unforgiveness, anger, sexual sin amongst many other vices is an open door that allows the enemy to thrive in a relationship. You need to RELEASE them from your heart, to receive all the blessings and peace you desire from God. Bottom line: work on yourself!


To be the one, you need to better yourself in your waiting period. You could volunteer for a job at that organisation, travel, find courses that would make you better mentally, get the skill set necessary for your journey, make yourself marketable by bringing something to the table, mental stimulation: you should be able to hold an intelligent conversation Do not build your entire life around a man, you are a total person. Do not just be a pretty face, add value to it. Be mentally ready for the task ahead!

Do not be stressed out about a partner that you neglect yourself in the process. Know who you are and what you love (your favourite food, colour, hobby, city) Take yourself out!! Enjoy your own company. Be whole as a lady. Explore (this helps you connect and hold some meaningful conversations. Do not let money be a problem, use travel agencies. You could plan all these with a low budget. Bottom line: Just do you!


Do not be fooled dear sister; a man is interested in your container first before the content. (That’s how God made them). So, look good (Whatever the budget). However minimal, use some original makeup products. Have a nice hairdo (neat and not smelly), ironed clothes (you don’t know who is watching you), polished shoes, use some belts with that trouser and look smart! Always have a fresh breath, take care of your room, your undergarment, your car (does it smell good, is it tidy), and lose some weight (if the doctor says you are obese and weighing more than necessary for your age and body type). This is because, how you look is very SPIRITUAL!!

Bottom line: You need to be neat and tidy, it does not have to be perfect but you could at least make some effort. Make a list of things you need to work on in your life and work towards achieving them.

Remember, to meet the one, you have to be the one. God help us all as we help yourself.

Author: Mary Odunayo

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